I'm a single lady and no, I'm not looking for a man to put a ring on it. As much as I like being in a relationship, I also like not being in one. Being single means I get to do what I want, how I want to, when I want to, with whomever I choose. There's no having to check in with another person to get their approval of things. There's no relationship drama to deal with. If I so chose, I could get into a 12 person drunken orgy full of women and men alike and there'd be no (relationship) repercussions. Now, not only would I never take part in said orgy but I also don't believe in dumping on relationships altogether. They can be something really good and really special once you find someone who is compatible with you to share it with. Some of the most fun times I've ever had has been when I'm been with someone (note: SOME of the most fun times). However, right now I'm in my "I'm single and happy 'bout it" phases with no intention of changing that anytime soon.
However, I have dear friends. Very dear friends. Usually, dear friends have concerns, especially when I'm single. Lately, the campaign has been for me to join Plenty of Fish, a dating site that doesn't take money from you. Just your face and your soul, plasters it on a profile and whores you out to different men until you find one you can stand. Ok, no, it's not that bad. It's just a dating site that tries to match you up with other people. Unless you couldn't figure out from my initial description of the site, I'm not the biggest fan of it or the idea of joining it. Why? Well, let me tell you!
First off, I'm someone who can be really open-minded but at the same time I can be set in my ways. A walking contradiction, if you will. When it comes to online dating it's not something I'm overly comfortable with for myself. I can't stress that enough. I know other people who have had raging success with the site. One of my best friends of all time has met someone truly special a la POF and one of my mom's closest friends has also found someone after being divorced and a single parent for umpteen years. So I'm not judging those who do use the site or any dating site. It's just that for me, personally, I know that if I were to go down that sort of avenue to find a date or a boyfriend or whatever then I'd be doing it for A) A joke or B) Out of desperation. Usually, I like to let life take its course when it comes to relationships. I've never had to go out looking for someone. They've always landed right in my lap. Granted, they haven't been the best relationships seeing as how none of them have worked but I've learned something from each one and have emerged a better person as thus. To tinker with that seems sort of wrong to me and I'd have to either not be serious about it or be DYING to be with someone in order to screw around with the way life goes (for me).
Secondly, I've (sort of) done the online thing before. My first serious relationship was with someone I met on an art site. We weren't looking for it or anything but a friendship through that means eventually led to a relationship. It's not a fun thing. It's full of frustrations and distance and constantly having to explain to people how you met. Yes, POF finds people who are geographically close to you but nothing it set in stone that I'll still be where I am for long. In fact, I'm counting on that. So what if I do meet someone and then boom, I move hours away? Then it's a long distance thing and I absolutely refuse to ever do that again. I've done that for 5 and a half years before. Never. Ever. Again.
Thirdly, POF is a free dating site. There's no money, no investment, therefore no risk. You know who's going to take advantage of such a system? Creeps looking for easy lays. This isn't as common on sites like Match.com or eHarmony because you pay quite a bit to get into their system, have them analyze who you are, and then match you up with your potential sweetie pie. I'm not saying it doesn't happen (there are examples saying otherwise) but it seems rampant on POF because it's free. Pay no money, tell a girl what she wants to hear, get her in bed, then disappear before she has time to say "I love you". Still don't believe me? Go find a friend of yours who has a profile on the site (I'd bet money you have at least one) and ask them for a POF horror story. Everyone has at least one. I'm already bitter and skeptical enough about humanity as a whole, let alone relationships. I really don't need someone else to come along and try to play peek-a-boo with my underwear as they try to tell me how much they like me, how amazing I am, how pretty I am, you know the bullshit drill.
Fourthly, the kind of guys I usually go for wouldn't ever go on POF. For anyone who's reading this and has NO CLUE who I am, I'm a metalhead. I go to shows and get whiplash from myself. I get bruises from strangers and like it. I can understand growling and screaming (mostly). I can appreciate the macabre art on album covers and t-shirts. Most of all, I love the music. There's just something about metal that completes me in a way I can't explain. Metal guys are what I go for and you don't need to have anything past a gr.1 education to know what that entails. As such, I don't even need to go into detail about how metal guys would never be caught dead having a POF account. Some have said "You need to try a different kind of guy. Obviously, metal guys aren't doing it for you." Not all metal guys are completely alike. That'd just be boring. And if you've ever been with a metal guy then you know how hard it is to quit them once you've had 'em! :P
So those are the reasons why I would never have a POF account. As such, I'm going back on my word completely and making one for the sole purpose of this blog to document just what I encounter. I highly doubt I'm going to meet anyone who I've any interest in, shares any of my interests, or any of that. If I do meet someone then the last test they can pass is being completely ok with the fact that I subjected them to what seems to be a sociology experiment :P I'm still a big fan of randomly meeting people and having things go from there but let's see what happens when I try this. I expect no results and many laughs, which is exactly what I want. Being single's fun. I sure as hell don't need no ring on it.
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